The literary complaints section – (File under, speaking freely, for whatever reason)
1.) In Austerlitz, the “10th Anniversary Edition” have starts out with one of those quaint introductions that’s crossing literary post-modern-ism with the holocaust. “Yuppie”-kai-yay mother fuckers. I’m so tired of that bullshit it makes me want to puke. Yes, I love post-modern thought, yes, the drama and history of the holocaust is immense, but really, did you have to give up the fucking ghost and a central point of Austerlitz before the book even starts? What a fucking buzzkill. This asshole, James Wood, just wrote this fucking introduction just to put his greedy grubby hands on the alliterated adumbrations of Austerlitz and Auschwitz. You know, it’s not so far a logical leap, mother fucker, that we need your shitty introduction to literally spell it out. So next time please take a seat at the back of the work and just write an afterword, please. I was seriously pissed at James’ aping of Sebald in order to explain him. I was hoping in fact that the introduction might be a piece of faux-narration setting the stage for the mise-en-abyme fictionalizing of non-fiction, so-called “Borgesian” stylization that he’s so famous for. Nope, I get a fucking mechanical, academic posturing jizz-fest instead. Fuck you, James Wood. But thank you for giving me the joy of saying, Fuck You, James Wood. Wood, as in penis, like “woody” or “stuffy.” And James, as in Jim, like Slim Jims. Or, Lou Reed’s Jim-Jims. Yeah. Fuck you, James Wood.
P.S. I’m really seriously jealous was able channel Sebald so well. ;P